Hope, it's a Foxy Thang

  I wrote, not that long ago, that this whole adoption thing is hard.  HARD.  I was discouraged, losing hope.  

Then I listened to a wise woman speak words of truth and promise.  God will do as He says.  Enter Hope once more...

I did it.  I have allowed myself to hope in a big way.  Well, it might not seem big, but it is symbolic and it feels big.  I bought something for our baby.  

True, I have a lot of toddler things we've been saving since we started the process.  I have zero baby stuff--no clothes, diapers, cute little baby bath tubs, nothing.  But, I have bought nothing.  I didn't want to allow my heart to go there, to feel like this thing was actually going to happen.  

I have generically thought about what life would be like.  We've made loose plans to move the older kids into a room together to make room for baby (this still hasn't happened yet).  I even went so far as to borrow a breast pump so I can attempt to jump start my milk supply (did I just write that?)--but I haven't actually tried.  

The point is, I keep delaying these things because it seems so far off, so unlikely to happen soon.  The truth is, I HAVE NO IDEA WHEN IT WILL HAPPEN.  (That was said in my best Owen Meany voice people, it seemed too fitting not to.)  

So this week, I took the plunge.  It was an impulse buy, really.  A small splurge, but it was meant specifically for a little one (ones??) that we will continue to love, hope, and wait for.

So, here it is.  A cute little fox coin bank.  Hope, it's a foxy thang!